Pulling to Stand

February 19, 2008 at 9:24 pm 9 comments

The year after Polly was born I cried every day.  It’s not a secret that my daughter’s diagnosis was hard to take.  It grieved me. 

People urged me to give it time.  “Let the baby change you,” they’d say.  “Soon enough, you’ll only see Polina, not the DS.”

One dad, whose adult daughter has Down syndrome, wrote, “I know the sun will rise again, and you will laugh again.  At some point, you will not choose any other child.” 

And they claimed there would be a thousand blessings in seeing my child break stereotypes, watching her pass the limits placed on her, learning how to love unconditionally and with abandon.

But I was unsure.  I didn’t know if I really would get excited about little things.  Things that come easy to most children.  Things that my daughter would have to fight for.  I was convinced that I would always focus on the bigness of Down syndrome; delays, lifetime parenting; health issues, stigma.

But now, most days, when I look at Polly, I don’t see the DS, I just see my daughter.

And I experience immense joy at her accomplishments.  I am much more emotional in general, towards all my girls.  I am taking deep breaths.  I am paying attention.  

Polly’s new trick is pulling to stand in her crib.  She is doing it daily now.  Every time I go up to get her and she is standing, we look at one another in amazement, and we laugh.  It’s as if she is saying, “I have no idea what I am doing, but it feels great.”

It’s a good season… pulling to stand. 



Entry filed under: Down syndrome, Parenting, Polly.

A Favor? Sabotage

9 Comments Add your own

  • 1. crickl's nest  |  February 19, 2008 at 11:48 pm

    Incredibly inspiring! She must be so cute standing there! I love that stage!

  • 2. theramblinghousewife  |  February 20, 2008 at 3:03 am

    Yay, Polly!!! She’ll be running circles around you in no time! 🙂

  • 3. Deanne  |  February 20, 2008 at 3:07 am

    Fabulous! I would think it would be a fun and welcome event no matter when it happens. We all are trying to enjoy our moments and stages with our children, again whenever they may come.

  • 4. Ging'  |  February 20, 2008 at 2:43 pm

    we should all have that attitude!! what ever life throws at us! we should just be happy to be doing something that makes others smile!

  • 5. Emily  |  February 20, 2008 at 4:54 pm

    Great post. I think we all feel — no matter what — that we’d rather have our child than any other.

  • 6. Sarah  |  February 20, 2008 at 7:14 pm

    I am so glad you “let the baby change you”! I can still remember sitting in the Carlson’s back yard during the summer and talking with you about lost dreams for both of our children. How we managed. I am so thankful you kept walking till you got to the joy of going into Polly’s room with her standing in her crib smiling at you. (Once you read this perhaps find a code for the name of our hosts. I couldn’t come up with one we would both understand.)

  • 7. Rosie  |  February 20, 2008 at 11:41 pm

    Hang in there, it will get easier. My own daughter has developmental delay but with lots of hard work and love she has done wonderfully. Your daughter will be the same because she has your love and support.

  • 8. kate  |  February 25, 2008 at 6:11 pm

    What a lovely post. Just what I needed this morning!

  • 9. Anonymous  |  March 12, 2008 at 12:25 am

    just what I needed
    6 week more and I will know who is my little one


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